Watch where you sit on the bus!

Hello world !!!
One more day left for 2004...
N its goodbye 2004...
How time flew this year... I really dunno...

A joke -->

A lady about eight months pregnant got on to a bus.
She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her.
She immediately moved to another seat.
This time the man's smile turned into a grin, so she moved again.
He now seemed very amused.
She moved a fourth time and the man burst out laughing.
She complained of this to the driver and he had the man arrested.
The case came up in court.
The judge asked the man; about 20 years old,
what he had to say for himself.
Very amusing..... The man replied,
"Well your Honor, it was like this.
When the lady got on the bus I couldn't help but notice her condition.
She sat under a sign that said
"The Double Mint Twins are coming", and I grinned.
Then she moved again and sat under a sign that said
"Slogan's liniment will reduce the Swelling", and I had to smile.
Then she moved and placed herself under a sign that said,
"Wrigley's Big Stick Did the Trick", and I could hardly contain myself.
But, your Honor, when she moved the fourth time and sat under a sign
that said, "Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident"...
I just lost it!

Tsunami aftershocks !!!

Hello world !!!
The Tsunami has left death and destruction which I've
not seen in my lifetime. Over 65,000 people are dead
and countless still missing. I just met a person whose
family survived the disaster in Velankani where they had been
on a pilgrimage to the holy Infant Jesus Church. He recalled the horror
he seen with his own eyes. The church is just about 100 feet away.
Dead bodies lying strewn all around. Horrible.
Andaman islands are the worst hit in India with relief operations
still not reached some of the islands. One good thing I've seen
about us Indians is the way people rally to give support in times
like these leaving region, religion, caste, color, etc aside.
Even the poor people who cant afford two square meals
per day are contributing their mite. I just met a young
boy who is collecting warm clothes to be sent across to Tamil Nadu
N' Sri Lanka to the victims; although he himself has no
decent clothes to wear.
To all the people involved in the relief work - We Salute you.
Keep up the good work.

Tsunami !!!

Hello World !!!
Heartfelt sympathies to all the families who lost their near
and dear ones in the Tsunami that lashed South east Asia
with an earthquake of 8.9 on the Richter scale.
Worst affected areas have been India, Lanka,
Indonesia, Malaysia n Thailand.
Tsunami meaning - Wall of Water in Japanese.
Imagine a wave of nearly 30 feet sweeping across the beach.
Uff.. Many crowd holidaying in Andaman n Nicobar islands
for Xmas vacations have been swept aside. Too bad.
May all their souls rest in peace. Amen.

Tuesday...

HeLLo WorLd...
How people behave when they owe U money?
They ignore your calls..Inaccessable...
Their wife picks up D phone..
Giving some lame excuse....
Its been 2 months since i've been running around
for the money my previous employer has to pay me...
He has told me to come tomorrow now...
Lets hope he gives it tomorrow.
I need the money for XmaS holidays man..
Cheers.. Have Fun...

Dear Employee:
As a result of the reduction of money budgeted for department areas,
we are forced to cut down on our number of personnel.
Under this plan, older employees will be asked to take early retirement,
thus permitting the retention of younger people who represent our future.
Therefore, a program to phase out older personnel
by the end of the current fiscal year, via retirement,
will be placed into effect immediately.
This program will be known as SLAP (Sever Late-Aged Personnel).
Employees who are SLAPPED will be given the opportunity
to look for jobs outside the company.
SLAPPED employees can request a review of their employment
records before actual retirement takes place.
This review phase of the program is called SCREW.
SCREW (Survey of Capabilities of Retired Early Workers).
All employees who have been SLAPPED and SCREWED
may file an appeal with upper management.
This appeal is called SHAFT (Study by Higher Authority Following Termination).
Under the terms of the new policy, an employee may be SLAPPED once,
SCREWED twice, but may be SHAFTED as many times
as the company deems appropriate. If an employee follows the above procedure,
he/she will be entitled to get: HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired
Personnel's Early Severance) or CLAP (Combined Lump sum Assistance Payment).
As HERPES and CLAP are considered benefit plans,
any employee who has received HERPES or CLAP
will no longer be SLAPPED or SCREWED by the company.
Management wishes to assure the younger employees
who remain on board that the company will continue its policy
of training employees through our: Special High Intensity Training (SHIT).
We take pride in the amount of SHIT our employees receive.
We have given our employees more SHIT than any company in this area.
If any employee feels they do not receive enough SHIT on the job,
see your immediate supervisor. Your supervisor is specially trained
to make sure you receive all the SHIT you can stand.
And, once again, thanks for all your years of service with us.

Rudolph the reindeer !!!!

Hello World !!!
Hey Folks ....
Its X'mas time...
Went to my friends house...
Decorated D Xmas tree... N' D house..
Remembered D old times...
Time for Carols...Remember D time when we
used to go Carol singing... so much fun....

"Jingle bells Jingle bells..jingle all D way..."

I liked - Rudolph the reindeer !!!!

Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer had a very shiny nose.
And if you ever saw him, you would even say it glows.
All of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names.
They never let poor Rudolph join in any reindeer games.
Then one foggy Christmas Eve Santa came to say:
"Rudolph with your nose so bright,
won't you guide my sleigh tonight?"
Then all the reindeer loved him as they shouted out with glee,
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, you'll go down in history!

week-end

Hello world !!!
Ahhha its Saturday....
I love Saturday....coz I dont have to worry
abt. getting up in D morning on Sunday.
Saturday night Full tight..
hmm...Drink...Make merry...
Khao Pio Majha Karo...is D motto...
Pata nahi Kal ho na ho...??????
Anyways .... have a nice week-end folks !!!
Enjoy..
Cheers..hic...


Route 22
Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers,
a State Police Officer see's a car puttering along at 22 MPH.
He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!
"So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.
Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies,
two in the front seat and three in the back, wide eyed
and white as ghosts.The driver, obviously confused, says to him,
"Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit!
What seems to be the problem?""Ma'am," the officer replies,
"You weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower
than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."
"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit
exactly twenty-two miles an hour!" the old woman says a bit proudly.
The State Police officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her
that "22" was the route number, not the speed limit.
A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer
for pointing out her error."But before I let you go, Ma'am,
I have to ask... Is everyone in this car OK?
These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered
a single peep this whole time," the officer asks.
"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer. We just got off Route 142."

Money !!!

Hello World !!!
Money money money !!!
Its all about the money honey !
Money talks bullshit walks...
How true...
Money drives the world today...
No matter how hard I try ...
I cant get rid of this feeling...
Sad but true..
Everythings driven by money nowadays...

Introspection ...

Hello World !!!
Just came across this Blog..
http://www.anitabora.com/blog/
Time for introspection...hmmmm....

1. Your ‘high’ moment of the year.
- "Uff come to think of it ,been high all year round".LOL

2. Your ‘low’ moment of the year.
- "Felt low when I was not selected to go Abroad on a project.
Though I was the right guy. Hmm ... Your time is gonna come..baby"

3. Faux pas/greatest regret.
- "Never regretted anything in life so far".

4. Something that got you 'almost famous' and nearly catapulted you into the Hall of Fame.
- "Scored D goal which qualified India for D World Cup (another Dream).

5. The 3 things you wanted to do the most this year, and did!
- "Wanted to come to Blore back - came back"
- "Update my skillsets - Yes to some extent"
- "Do something for the needy - Yes N' No"

6. The 3 things you wanted to do the most this year, and couldn’t/didn’t!
- "Keep my folks happy - A big No"
- "Play a game in D morning to lose flab- Could not do it"
- "Do something for the needy - No - not what I should have"

7. Number of resolutions you made for 2004. And how many you actually stuck to.
- "I resolved to make no more resolutions."

8. The list of cities/ places/ countries you visited in 2004.
- Mangalore, Manipal, Udupi, Kumta, Honnavar, Goa, Karwar.

9. Your movie of the year award goes to...
- "Dont watch no movies".

10. A friend lost? A friend found? A friend made?
Lost - Cristiano De Lima Junior
Found - Many
Made - Lotsa

11. You will remember 2004 as the year of …
- "Lost Somewhere in Time".

12. The 3 things you really want to do in 2005.
- " Find D right girl to settle down in life"
- " Get serious about my career"
- " Make more smiles per hour"

13. A set of 13 words that will be your keywords for 2005!
Football, Love, Lost, Smile, Happy, Blog, Achieve, Money, Beach, Goa, Bangalore, Girl.

Hello World !!!
A nice e-mail I got...

While In Very Deep Thought Today
I Discovered Something.
I Found The Answer To
A Great Mystery !
OK, OK, ! ?
So I Was Just Lounging Around The House Not Doing Much Of Anything.
Anyway, I Did Find The Answer To A
Question I Had.
I Really Hope I'm Not Bugging You.
If I Am ?
Just Listen To Me Anyway !
You See, Before I Met You
I Was Kind Of Missing Something.
But Not Anymore. No, No. Because I Know You AreThere For Me Now
As A True & Real Life Friend.
If I Go Just A Little Crazy.
You Are There.
I Mean You Are The Kind Of Friend That Would Even Try To Help Save My...
Well, You Know What,.. Behind Me All The Way Aren't You. ( So To Speak )
I Know It Sounds A Little Nutty. But So Are We.
That's Why You Are My Very Good Friend.

- Love isn't finding a perfect person, it's seeing an imperfect person perfectly

Martian Sex

Hello World !!!
Had an extended week-end.
Went to my village on Saturday.
Had lots of Fish - Prawns, Ladyfish, Pomfret, Molllusk, Squids...
Hmmm mOuth watering aha...I love seafood....
with lotsa beer....
Hey folks another week to go for X'mas !!!
Have fun !!!!
Cheers !!!!

Martian Sex >
Mike and Maureen landed on Mars after accumulating enough frequent flier >miles.
They met a Martian couple and were talking about all sorts of things.
Mike >asked if Mars had a stock market, if they had laptop computers,
and how they >made money, >
Finally, Maureen brought up the subject of sex.
"Just how do you guys do it?" >asked Maureen. >T
he male Martian responded, "Pretty much the way you do."
>A discussion ensued, and finally the couples decided to swap partners for the >night. Maureen and the male Martian went off to a bedroom
where the Martian >stripped.
Maureen was disappointed to find that he had a teeny weeny member,
>about half an inch long and just a quarter inch thick. >
"I don't think this is going to work," said Maureen. >
"Why?" he asked. "What's the matter?" >
"Well," she replied, "it's just not long enough to reach me!" >
"No problem," he said, and proceeded to slap his forehead with his palm.
With >each slap, his member grew until it was impressively long. >
"Well," she said, "that's quite impressive, but it's still pretty narrow." >
"No problem," he said, and started pulling his ears.
With each pull, his >member grew wider and wider. >"
Wow!" she exclaimed. They fell into bed and made mad, passionate love. >
The next day, the couples joined their normal partners
and went their >separate ways. As they walked along,
Mike asked, "Well, was it any good?" >"I hate to say it,"
said Maureen, "but it was pretty wonderful.
How about >you?" >"It was horrible," he replied.
"All I got was a headache.
She kept slapping >my forehead and pulling my ears."

Bangalore Habba...

Hello World !!!
Bangalore Habba rocks...
Today the park was crowded.
Three bands were playing. I went late at around 8 pm.
The last band "Synopase" were playing.
Somehow I dont like the new sound the Bands play these days.
Generation gap maybe... But me still like plain old Rock n' roll
of the 70's and 80's ...nothing like it...
Deep purple, Led Zeppelin, Judas Priest, Iron Maiden,
Van Halen, Rolling Stones, Eagles...Cant get Enuf....of them.
Anyways....Have Fun...Cheers....

Blonde Joke --->>>

A blonde is terribly overweight,
so her doctor puts her on a diet.
"Iwant you to eat regularly for two days,
then skip a day, and repeat thisprocedure for two weeks.
The next time I see you, you'll have lost atleast five pounds."
When the blonde returns, she's lost nearly 20 pounds.
"Why, that's amazing!" the doctor says.
"Did you follow my instructions?"
The blonde nods. "I'll tell you, though,
I thought I was going to dropdead that third day."
"From hunger, you mean?" asked the doctor.
"No, from skipping!"

Threinody !!

Hello World !!!
Went for a Rock concert yesterday at Cubbon Park.
The Band "Threinody" were performing.
This band is a heavy metal band comprising of -
Siddhart - Lead Singer/Bass/Rhythm
Premik - Lead Guitarist
Satish - Drums
I met Satish through a common friend last year.
Used to go for their Jam sessions last year.
Never happened to see them live.
So after a long time I finally saw them live.
They played lots of their own compositions.
I liked the way they played - " Children of the Grave" - by Black Sabbath.
They have come out with their own CD - "Threinody"
with 18 songs.
I liked one song from that "Alone Again"; infact I liked it
when they used to practice it in the Jam sessions.
Have Fun !!!
Cheers !!!

ALONE AGAIN
It's cold where I come from
It's even colder where I'm going
The blizzards from my past have frozen me
I've ceased to dream
Just leave me be in my
Eternal isolation
Cherish this non-existence
Never violate my being again
But why can't I hear the past weep
For the things I've tried to forgetwhen it's all done and said
I've tried to throw away the key
But somebody always brings it back to me
I cannot see those colours now
My eyes have become impervious to light
The walls are closing in
I feel, but I cannot touch
This journey had to end
The man became a boy again
He ceased to struggle, he ceased to dream
He ceased to kick, he ceased to scream
Don't say it's beginning
Tell me it's ending
Is my past the future
Is my present the past

"?-u-n-t"

Hello World !!!

Finally my cold has receded. Feeling good now.
A good conconation of Brandy, honey and warm water did the trick.
Bad medicine .... I like it...

A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane
when he heard that the Pope was on the same flight.
"This is exciting," thought the gentleman.
"I've always been a big fan of the Pope.
Perhaps I'll be able to see him inperson.
"Imagine his surprise when the Pope sat down
in the seat next to him for the flight.
Still, the gentleman was too shy to speak to the Pontiff.
Shortly after takeoff, the Pope began a crossword puzzle.
"This is fantastic," thought the gentleman.
"I'm really good at crosswords.
Perhaps, if the Pope gets stuck, he'll ask me for assistance."
Almost immediately, the Pope turned to the gentleman and said,
"Excuse me,but do you know a four letter word
referring to a woman that ends in'u-n-t'?
"Only one word leapt to mind...
"My goodness," thought the gentleman,
"Ican't tell the Pope that. There must be another.
" The gentleman thought forquite a while, then it hit him.
Turning to the pope, the gentleman said,
"Ithink you're looking for the word 'Aunt'."
"Oh of course," said the Pope. "Do you have an eraser?"

Cristiano De Lima Junior - II

Hello world !!!
Cristiano De Lima Junior's death has been in the headlines
for two days now. The blame game has begun.
Nobody wants to take responsibility. Pathetic.
Went out drinking y'sterday...Sloshed..
Had lots of Brandy...with warm water...For the Cold...
Finally today Im feeling better after 3 days of Cold.
Bad medicine sometimes work I guess...

A shy gentleman was preparing to board a plane
when he heard that the Popewas on the same flight.
"This is exciting," thought the ge.

Car, Auto, Used Cars:

Cristiano De Lima Junior

Hello world !!!
Heartfelt sympathies to Cristiano De Lima Junior's family.
Dempo vs Mohun Bagan final.
Cristiano De Lima Junior from Brazil playing for Dempo, Goa
scores the 2nd goal and i watch him
as he goes to celebrate on the touchline N' falls.
Im at the other end of the stadium celebrating the goal,
but I see his fellow players frantically calling the Ref.
to call for medical help. My first reaction was that he
got injured when his team mate might have jumped on him
accidentally. But when the game got delayed for 20 minutes N'
he was taken out of the stadium in the ambulance - I felt something
was terribly wrong. The game over - I went home.
In the evening I was shocked to hear of his death.
Such a young athletic footballer of 25 years dies - its tragic.
He was the Indian National Football League highest scorer last year.
Such a huge loss to Indian football.
I read in the papers that there were no proper medical facilities in
the ambulance N' he could have been saved if not for it.
Shows the apathy of Indian football.
Basic facilities are not available.
Cristiano De Lima Junior- "May his soul rest in peace"

RHTDM

Hello World !!!
Another Saturday night.
Days R passing by so fast.
Its December.
Its Xmas.
RHTDM - Rehana Hai Tere Dil Mein
Just listening to the songs from this movie.
Nice sentimental songs.

Song for Saturday night

POISON - Nothin’ but a good time

Now listen
Not a dime, I can’t pay my rent
I can barely make it through the week
Saturday night I’d like to make my girl
But right now I can’t make ends meet
I’m always workin’ slavin’ every day
Gotta get away from that same old same old
I need a chance just to get away
If you could hear me think this is what I’d say
Chorus:Don’t need nothin’ but a good time
How can I resist
Ain’t lookin’ for nothin’ but a good time
And it don’t get better than this
They say I spend my money on women and wine
But I couldn’t tell you where I spent last night
I’m really sorry about the shape I’m in
I just like my fun every now and then
I’m always workin’ slavin’ every day
Gotta get away from that same old same old
I need a chance just to get away
If you could hear me think this is what I’d say
Chorus
You see I raise a toast to all of us
Who are breakin’ our backs every day
If wantin’ the good life is such a crime
Lord, then put me away
Here’s to ya

have a nice week-end

Hello World !!!
Got a bad bout of cold.
Nose has been running and been sneezing all day.
Got a bad headache. Hmmm.
Too abd to happen at the week-end.
Going for the semi-final match
b/w Mohun Bagan Vs. Sporting club D Goa now.
Bye N' have a nice week-end Folks !!!

A joke ->
A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him
that because he was wearing his seat belt,
he had just won $5,000 in a safety competitition.
"What are you going to do with the money?" the officer asked.
The man responded, "I guess I'll go to driving school and get my license."
At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him,
chimed in, "Officer, don't listen to him. He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."
This woke up the guy in the back seat,
who, when he saw the cop,
blurted out, "I knew we wouldn't get far in this stolen car."
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk,
and a voice asked, "Are we over the border yet?"

have a nice week-end

Hello World !!!
Got a bad bout of cold.
Nose has been running and been sneezing all day.
Got a bad headache. Hmmm.
Too abd to happen at the week-end.
Going for the semi-final match
b/w Mohun Bagan Vs. Sporting club D Goa now.
Bye N' have a nice week-end Folks !!!

A joke ->
A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him
that because he was wearing his seat belt,
he had just won $5,000 in a safety competitition.
"What are you going to do with the money?" the officer asked.
The man responded, "I guess I'll go to driving school and get my license."
At that moment, his wife, who was seated next to him,
chimed in, "Officer, don't listen to him. He's a smart aleck when he's drunk."
This woke up the guy in the back seat,
who, when he saw the cop,
blurted out, "I knew we wouldn't get far in this stolen car."
At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk,
and a voice asked, "Are we over the border yet?"

Some guys have all the luck

Hello World !!!

Some guys have all the luck.
Some guys have all the fun.
And some guys do nothing, nothing yeah.
How true !!!
There's a friend of mine who works as a Waiter
in a beach resort in Goa. He is so lucky with girls.
Last season he got friendly with a lady from Germany.
Spent 3 months with her touring the country.
Season before that lady from U.K.
This season lady from Russia.
He is supposed to fly to Russia with her.
She is arranging everything - money, stay,etc.
for him in Moscow.
Certainly some guys have all the luck.
Cheers!!!

Word of the day

contretemps \KAHN-truh-tahn\, noun; plural contretemps \-tahnz\:
An inopportune or embarrassing situation or event; a hitch.

Eg: Mrs. Post was the center of a notable contretemps when she
spilled a spoonful of berries at a dinner of the Gourmet.

Viva D' Sporting Club De Goa

Hello World !!!
Went for the match y'sterday evening...
Sporting Club De Goa upset East Bengal 1-0.
The young Goan team deserved to win.
They played very well.
Viva D' Sporting Club De Goa.
Semifinals on Friday.
1. Tollygunge Vs Dempo
2. Mohun Bagan Vs. Sporting Club De Goa
Nothing much to blog.
Have fun...
Cheers !!!!